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OD:
I would
like to welcome back Mac Horn, author of “The Sex Guide
to the Philippines,” “Panties Down before Money Down!,”
(Available through Dexter-Horn Productions at 1-818-2021).
Mac, thanks for being with us today.
I know that you lived in the Philippines for almost
two years and have been traveling there for almost a decade.
Can you talk about what it has to offer in terms
of the beaches and the nightlife?
MH: There are basically four beach resorts in the
Philippines that are suitable for tourists: La Union; Boracay;
Puerto Galleria and Subic Bay.
Of these four, Boracay is probably the most scenic,
but it is also the most secluded in that it offers almost
nothing in terms of nightlife.
So, if you decide to go to Boracay, I would strongly
suggest that you take a girl with you.
There is no nightlife there worth talking about.
OD: How
about the nightlife in the other beach resorts?
MH: The nightlife in La Union, Puerta Galleria and
Subic Bay sucks, if you ask me.
Each resort has a small cluster of bars that offer
a poor selection of women and will serve to keep you entertained
for a maximum of two or three days.
After that, you will probably find yourself quite
bored and wish that you had brought a girl along with you.
OD: So,
then are you saying there is really no place in the Philippines
that combines both great beaches and nightlife?
MH: Unfortunately, yes, that is the case.
The most beautiful and scenic areas to travel in
the Philippines, such as Boracy and Puerto Galleria, are
pretty much the worse places to go to pick up on women.
And the town that offers the most in terms of women
and nightlife, named Angeles City, offers nothing in terms
of scenery (the town is quite filthy) and is a two hour
ride from the closest beach (i.e., Subic Bay).
So, the combination of beach and nightlife is pretty
much hard to come by in the Philippines.
OD: What
about Subic Bay? Isn’t
that where the US Naval Base was once located?
What is happening in terms of nightlife there?
Subic is a pretty nice beach resort, so I have heard.
MH: Subic
is pretty, but at best it is worth only a two or three day
visit. At present,
there are only a handful of bars that offer anything even
remotely worthwhile in terms of nightlife.
Actually, when I was in Subic a few months ago, I
did meet a really cute Filipina dancer named Rosalie.
She worked in the bar, Tahiti Club, which is by far
the most happening bar in town and has a pretty good selection
of women. It
is my favorite bar.
OD: What
about other bars in Subic?
MH: Next
to Tahiti bar, you will find Fox Hole Bar and Muff Divers
Bar, both of which have a handful of fairly decent women.
Actually, Fox Hole is a beer drinkers haven in that
you can get a San Miguel for less than 50 cents, if you
can believe that, and I might add, you can get laid right
there in the back room of the bar for as cheap as $7.50!
So, if you are on a budget, you can find Subic quite
inexpensive. However,
as the saying goes, “You get what you pay for.”
In Subic, you can pay little, and you get little.
By little, I mean in terms of the selection.
The bar girls are for the most part sweethearts,
but there are just not many to choose from.
OD: How
many girls work in these bars?
MH: Tahiti Club has the largest selection
of women. There
are about 16 dancers and around 6 waitresses or so.
In Fox Hole, I would guess that they have about 12
dancers and 4 or 5 waitresses.
The same numbers apply to Muff Divers.
By the way, I should mention the girl I ran across
in Muff Divers did not set well with me. A friend of mine took out one girl for the night and after
paying the 1,000 peso bar fine($22), she dumped the guy
before he even got a chance to touch her.
I have not yet heard of such a problem in Tahiti
Club or Fox Hole.
OD: What
about the other bars.
MH: Most
of the other bars, such as “Yellow Teeth,” Head and Tail”
and “392” cater to the local Filipino men and for that reason
I suggest you stay out of them.
The basic rule in the Philippines is simply this:
You stay away from the men in any situation.
Also, bars like “392” exercise what is called the
double standard, which means as a foreigner, they will charge
you two, or up to three times the price for drinks and girls.
For example, in “392,” they were quoting a bar fine
of 1,500 pesos($33) which is an outrageous price.
Compare that with the 600 peso bar fine in Fox Hole.
(The bar fine is the price you pay to have sex with
a bar girl; when you pay the bar fine, the girl is supposed
to back with you to your hotel and spend the entire night.)
So, these are the bars that you want to avoid.
In short, there are only three bars worth visiting
in Subic, namely, Tahiti, which has the best looking girls,
Fox Hole, which has the lowest prices, and Muff Divers,
which I will end up at only as a last resort.
OD: So,
are the beaches in Subic Bay worth visiting? Not really.
There is one area that I somewhat enjoyed, namely
the beachfront at By The Sea Hotel.
The water there is clean and fun to swim in.
However, if you are looking for a sandy beach to
lie out your towel and enjoy the sun, you will be both disappointed
and annoyed.
OD: Why
is that?
MH: As
is typical of the Philippines, the Filipino men fuck everything
up. The minute
you step foot on the beach at By The Sea (or any other beach
for that matter) a group of very stubborn and obnoxious
street vendors are going to drive you nuts as they will
try to sell you their worthless costume jewelry and sea
shells. I tell you, these vendors are worse than flies on shit, and
no matter how much you ignore them or try to tell them politely
you are not interested in what they have to sell, they are
going to pester the crap out of you.
Eventually, you will realize that the only way that
you are going to get rid of them is to leave the beach,
walk into your hotel room, and lock the door behind you.
OD: Can’t
you just tell them that you are not interested in what they
have to sell and would like to be left alone?
MH: Telling
them that would only draw a crowd of even more who have
taken notice that you appear, from a distance, to express
interest. The
first rule in the Philippines in dealing with street vendors
or beggars is to ignore them as if they did not exist. Talking, whether you are saying “Yes” or “No,” is interpreted
by all vendors as an open invitation to deliver their sales
pitch. Once
this happens, they will never leave you alone.
OD: So
how about buying something from them?
MH: What
are you, nuts? That
would attract every vendor, con-artist and beggar within
miles. You
never buy anything from or give any money to any vendor
on the beach or in open public.
If you do, you will be the most popular guy in town
and every time that you step foot outside your hotel, you
will have your own private fan club who will drive you absolutely
crazy until you have spent your last dime on whatever pile
of crap it is that they wish to sell.
OD: That
does not sound like a very inviting position to be in.
MH: Unfortunately,
that is the Philippines for you.
When you arrive at the beach, the vendors are going
to target you like you were handing out $100 bills for free.
They just do not go away and will do whatever they
can to get whatever they can out of you.
This is the nature of the Filipino street vendor.
Plague the tourist to death until he breaks. They broke me, and that is probably why I will never return
to Subic. It
is quite obnoxious and extremely boring.
OD: What
about La Union Beach?
MH: La
Union is actually a fairly nice beach resort.
When I was there with my girlfriend, Jeanly, last
year, we stayed at the Coconut Grove Hotel, situated right
on the beach. The hotel, at about $25/night, was real nice, had decent food,
and a very clean swimming pool.
The beach is fairly scenic and stretches out for
miles. Right outside your hotel, you can hire a boat for about $5
that will take you on an excursion to the islands.
The best time to go is either in the early morning
or the late afternoon.
Be sure to wear a hat and lots of suntan lotion,
as even in the early morning, the sun is scorching hot.
By the way, I found La Union beach to be quite peaceful
and romantic. It
is a great place to fall in love.
Oh yes, I should mention that the boat engines are
extremely loud, so bring some cotton or tissue to stuff
in your ears to deaden the noise. It is real bad.
OD: Does
La Union have anything to offer in the way of nightlife.
MH: Not
really. If
you go there, I highly recommend that you take a girl with
you. There
are a few bars that feature girls dancing on a stage in
bikinis, but the selection is quite limited.
It would be best to bring your own date along.
OD: So,
if one goes to La Union or any one of those other beach
resorts—and these resorts do not seem to offer much in terms
of women—where does one go to find a woman to bring with
him?
MH: Okay,
that is a good question and here is what my suggestion is
if you are coming to the Philippines with both girls and
beaches in mind. When you first arrive at the Manila Airport, take a private
airport taxi to Angeles City.
Angeles itself is a shit-hole.
It is a filthy town with little to do there—however,
it offers the most in terms of nightlife and meeting women.
In fact, it offers quite a bit.
At present, Angeles has about 50 or 60 active bars,
all of which are packed out with some of the world’s most
affectionate women.
Some even refer to the Angeles City bar girls as
“Fucking Machines” because that is exactly what they are:
Just about all of them fuck like bunny rabbits if you play
the game of falling in love and romancing them, you will
get more sex than you can handle.
OD: You
find them working as dancers and waitresses in the bars.
Most of the bars are located on Fields Avenue that
runs parallel to the base that once housed the US Military.
The base shut down in 1991 and has now been taken
over by the Philippine Air Force.
Along Fields Avenue, and a few side streets (including
Santos, which is known as Blow Job Alley) you will find
a good 50 to 60 bars, each of which employ about 40 women,
including dancers, hostesses, waitresses, cashiers and door
girls. So,
altogether, we are talking a good 1,500 working girls, enough
to keep one guy busy for a while.
Most of the girls who work in the bars are available
for sex, provided that you pay what is called the “bar fine.”
Most of the bars charge 1,000 pesos, or less than
$25 for the bar fine, which is the fee that you pay to have
the dancer or waitress leave the bar and have sex with you
all night. If
you can find a dancer or waitress who you like, you can
bar fine her for several days and that would be your chance
to take her to the beach, such as Puerto Gallera, Boracay,
La Union or Subic.
OD: Are
most of the girls who you meet in Angeles City, prostitutes?
MH: To
be honest, yes. Man
of the girls you will meet in the bars in Angeles, are working
as hookers, but many are also there to get involved and
fall in love with a tourist.
In fact, there is no doubt that many of the girls
are working in the bars in hope of marrying a foreigner,
especially if he is an American.
I know this for a fact because I have several friends
who have come to Angeles to find their dream girl and sure
enough, they are now living with their Filipina wives in
the US. Fantasy
turned into reality.
It happens and can happen to you, quite easily, actually.
OD: So,
if you find a girl who you like in Angeles, how do you take
her to the beach?
MH: I
would do this. I would spend at least four or five days in Angeles and just
check out the scene.
Try to explore as much as you can and check out as
many girls as possible. When you meet a bar girl who you like, spend at least two or
three full days with her to se how the two of you get along.
If things are looking good, tell her that you would
like to take her to the beach and spend the rest of your
vacation with her.
Most likely, she will agree and be enthralled with
your invitation. Most
Filipina girls are extremely eager to get into a relationship
with a foreigner.
It is a piece of cake.
OD: So,
once you find a girl you want to take to the beach, how
does this bar fine thing work out?
Do you have to pay the bar fine in advance?
MH: My
suggestion is, if you find a girl who you really like, tell
her to quit the bar right then and there.
Do not give any money to the bar.
Instead, offer her 700 pesos/day to go to the beach
with you and agree to pay her daily.
That’s a good deal because it is less than what you
would have to pay the bar and a higher commission than what
she would split from the bar fine (most bars split the bar
fine 50/50 with the girl).
So, you both stand to come out ahead.
Remember this: if you pay the bar in advance, most
bars will not refund your money if things go sour between
you and the girl.
So, your only guarantee that your girl will stick
with you throughout your entire beach journey is if you
pay her directly daily.
If you pay the bar fine in advance, well, once the
bar has the money, who is to say they will give it to the
girl or give it back to you if the girl bails on you in
the middle of your trip?
The best plan is to have the girl quit the bar and
you pay her directly in cash each day.
That will motivate her to stay with you, earn her
a high salary and save you some bucks all in one breath.
Plus, if things do not work out along the way, you
will not have to put out a lump sum of money to a bar that
will that will more than likely not offer you your money
back. Not to be negative here—Most likely the girl you choose
will turn out to be a sweetheart—but it is best to protect
yourself. Things
can and do go wrong.
I should also mention that if the girl is willing
to quit the bar, it is a really good sign that the girl
really likes you.
If she is not willing to quit, there is a good chance
that she is only after your money.
OD: So,
once the girl agrees to quit the bar and go with you, then
what?
MH: Just
tell her which beach you wish to go to and she will help
you get there. Swagman
Travel, located at the Swagman Hotel in Angeles and Manila,
has excursions to the beaches and can assist you in all
of your travel arrangements.
My suggestion is that you start off your journey
by going to Boracay.
Once you arrive at the beach, the girl you have chosen
will pretty much take care of you (including hand washing
your clothes) and will probably try and convince you that
she is the girl who you should try and spend the rest of
your life with. Perhaps the woman you meet will end up being exactly like that,
and all I can say is if you end up with that, you have found
your own little paradise.
OD: Mac,
that sounds great.
We wish to thank you for your time and hope to hear
from you again.
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